Tuesday 4 September 2007

Sadistic Torture

Now which evil man invented the gym? I say man because no woman would willingly choose to go and inflict masses of amounts of torture on herself with machines that look as if they belong in a Steven Spielberg alien invasion film. We prefer to be at home eating chocolate, or perhaps taking a gentle soothing bath with lavender oil, or even engaging in an all night drinking marathon. (The latter most likely being me)

Nothing in this world prepares you for an evening at the gym; the beautiful bodies posing in the full length mirrors (which are under florescent lighting JUST to make me feel worse), the sweating, the pain, the paranoid feeling that everyone is staring at you and sniggering under breath and last but not least the pure exhaustion as you try to stumble back to your home after a major work out session.

Last night I went to my local gym for my boxing class and this morning I am very sore. I hurt, in places that I didn't even know it was possible to hurt. Granted it was fun and perving over the hot instructor was even better BUT Miss M should learn that trying to chat him up whilst I'm sweating like a pig with my wet hair plastered to my bright red face and breathing remarkably heavily, and not in a sexy way, is probably not the best way to attempt to pick him up.

Oh well, I'll try harder next time

10 comments:

TBHanks said...

If you're in a boxing class you could always punch his lights out if he says anything funny...

The Divine Miss M said...

I was thinking about that last night. Especially as he kept ragging me about working harder, as if sweat pouring down my red face wasn't bad enough!

Unknown said...

I could never do it. Flirt while exercising? Not a chance in hell.

The Divine Miss M said...

I don't think I shall be doing it again either.

Actually a couple of months ago this guy tried to pick me up after a particularily heavy session at the gym. I wasn't very receptive. Perhaps it was the fact that even I could smell my own sweat and know how truly horrific I look whilst exercising. One can only think he was interested in the way my boobs move up and down whilst I'm running ...

TBHanks said...

Or he thought you have a great personality and it doesn't matter what you look like?
Or he's just a freak...hmmm...why are they always in gyms.
I remember a particulary bad bunch in Mauy Thai classes but fortunately we were learning how to kick each other in the guts. Nobody tried their luck.

Unknown said...

Cos all the toned people hang out in the gym- all,that is except me- don't care which way my boobs moved- people in gyms are often freaky.

The Divine Miss M said...

That they are, that they are. But here in London you tend to see a lot of fat people in the gym which is definitely what I like to see. I feel thin and toned then!

Unknown said...

Ja, kinda like the time I went to the states...man, I could've been Heidi Klum!

MidniteGem said...

Well done on getting to the gym leigh ...you've had better luck then me! I booked the boxing class for tonight but have chicken out cause am too tired. So it is all down to the personal trainer appointment on Thursday to get me in there! Wish me luck !

The Divine Miss M said...

Go Gem! I'm sure you'll do fine ;) I am going to try and go to this circit class on Thursday, doubt it'll happen tho!