Rules of Commuting

There is this group on facebook called "I secretly want to punch slow walking people in the back of the head"; now for me this is not secretive. I mutter, hiss, throw my eyes around, glare and generally walk on the back of the heels of these slow people.

I mean REALLY! If you are travelling during rush hour commuting times in London please do NOT walk at a snails pace. Tourists should be banned from using the tube between the hours of 7-10am and 5-8pm during the week. They annoy me.

So from one girl who commutes that horrid route every day to all those others out there please can you obey these basic rules?

1) Do NOT stand on the left hand side of the escalator - this is reserved for the many of us who wish to walk up/down in order to get home as quick as possible

2) Coming to a standstill in front of the ticket turnstiles and then searching for your travel card whilst a queue forms behind you is not good protocol - PLEASE have it in hand before approaching the entrance/exit

3) When you do get to the front of the queue to buy your ticket please do not get confused with the money and argue with the ticket seller over the exchange rate/price. Quickly ask for you ticket, pay and leave.

4) Dragging wheelie suitcases behind you during rush hour is just stupid. And dangerous.

5) Yes we are all pressed up against each other but this is not an excuse to feel my arse.

6) Stand on either side of the door to allow people to exit as quick as possible. Do not block their exit or my entry as this just confuses things and I REALLY want to get home.

7) I do not want to talk to you. Mornings are not a happy place. Silence is golden.

8) When I sigh with frustration because of a delay on the track due to someone throwing themselves in front of the train please remember that this is because I encounter it way too often and not because I am a heartless bitch.