Feeling Blue

When I started on this show I was very derogatory and rude about the fake friendships that my colleagues all seemed to have. However after 3 months I've realised it isn't fake and that we have all become friends. We have personal jokes, spend the majority of the day laughing, eat lunch together and go out and get pissed together. Unfortunately I only have 2 more days left of this until my contract ends and I am on to pastures new.

I'm going to miss them. We've gone through so much together and have shared so many funny experiences that not seeing them every day seems like such a strange thought.

I know it probably won't continue, even though we are promising to meet up for lunch since we will still be working in the same company but somehow I just don't see it happening. We'll all bond with our new teams and hang out with them.

I hate this part, the saying "goodbye" time.

Maybe this time it'll be different ...

Colleague Entertainment

So yesterday my colleague took a big step in her personal life. She has been seeing this guy for about 7 weeks and yesterday she changed her facebook status to “in a relationship”. Now I don’t know how many of you use facebook but I swear that program has opened up whole new relationship stress that none of us needs. Within 10 minutes of her doing so she received about 6 wall posts and further messages from people demanding to know what/where/who/why. She even received a message from said guy’s housemate going “oh wow, so you guys are official now, I didn’t know that, congratulations”. This was proceeded by complete panic stations from the colleague as the sudden worry that perhaps the said guy didn't assume they were in a relationship.

Colleague: We've been seeing each other for about 7 weeks now, and spent a couple of full weekends together, what does that mean?

Miss M: *talks without thinking* Well have you had THE DISCUSSION?

Colleague: Oh my god, no not really. Do you think he doesn't think we're in a relationship? I mean if he did think we were I'm sure he would have told the housemate. What if he doesn't think we are and I've just posted it for the world? Oh my god, he might dump me. But can he dump me if we're not together? Are we together?

Miss M: Breathe, didn't he say you're coming to his family lunch in a couple of weeks? That's relationshippy

Colleague: You're right. You wouldn't invite a random shag to a family event. Wow, I'm going to meet the family, that's big.

Miss M: Well that clears it up.

*tries to do her work*

Colleague: But what if he didn't want people to know we were together?

Miss M: Why would he want that?

Colleague: Because we're not dating?

Miss M: But if you weren't why would he want you to meet his parents?

*attempts to slit her wrists with the plastic knife from lunch*

Damn facebook for getting me involved in my colleagues lives. Okay so it was rather entertaining.

They apparently had THE DISCUSSION last night and they are in a relationship and he was fine about the facebook status. He did however say "Check with me before you change it to married ok?"

That opened up a whole new can of worms today let me tell you!

Be Proud

So today, at 1730pm, I finally removed Boy with Girlfriend from my MSN contacts. Yesterday I deleted his phone number from my phone along with all all of his emails.

Unfortunately I neglected to mention to him that I was doing this before I got rid of all the contacts for him but we'll see if he even notices that his "Other Woman" has disappeared.

*sigh*

Meeting Men

Working in television has it's many perks but one of the downsides is that it is near to impossible to meet a man. Why is this you ask? Well the majority of them seem to be gay. I don't know if this is because you need to be a catty superior bitch to work in TV or if it is just because all creative and intelligent men are gay?

And if you are straight and happen to work in TV you are snapped up in record time because it really is such a rarity.

Christmas and Wrap parties are the worst; do you know how cringworthy it is watching a bunch of inebriated woman scan the crowd looking for a victim, be too drunk to realise or care that they are gay, and to rub themselves suggestively up against them. It leads to very amusing and embarrassing stories the next day when the photographs are brought out and they suddenly remember trying to shove their tongue down the blatantly obvious camp gay man.

So what does this leave me with; City Boys? Testosterone filled builders? Sleezy Sales men? Nerdy IT boys?

I think I might stick to hot gay men ...

The morning after

Back at my desk this morning in the office and I can not concentrate on anything else other than the monumentally stupid mistake I made last night in going to see Boy with Girlfriend. I'm obsessively checking my MSN to see if he is there yet, my phone is never more than an inch away from me and every conversation I have with someone in the office keeps trailing off on my side because my mind keeps drifting back to this stupid situation.

I'm not texting him - he hasn't texted me - I refuse to call him - he hasn't called me - I want to talk to him - I refuse to contact him. It is like some stupid cycle and I wonder when I'm going to give in. I can't let him have all the power can I? However when I'm there with him and he's whispering in my ear my entire body melts. I'm in serious trouble here ...

I think I need a new obsession.

Oops

So tonight after work I did a really stupid thing. Against my better judgement I went to go and meet Boy with a Girlfriend* for a cup of coffee. I don't really know what I was expecting or why I went but all reason went completely out of my head and just left the office, got on the tube and went to see him.

We ended up sitting in a Cafe Nero kissing for a good 30 minutes - not in any innocent way I might add! Now I'm ever so confused as to what I should do. I adore the guy, I want to be with him and I think that we would be fantastic together. But there is the small problem of his girlfriend and they don't seem to be breaking up any time soon. I am trying to weight up the pros and cons as to whether I should stick around and try to win him or bail whilst I'm not completely emotionally invested in this.

Gem and her lovely boyfriend say that as long as they aren't living together he is fair game. Varen thinks that I should tell him straight up to leave the girlfriend and Fligela thinks that I should run as fast as possible in the opposite direction.

I honestly don't know if he is even considering the idea of leaving the girlfriend - I'm too scared to bring it up unless he says no he isn't and then stops talking to me and I'm also scared to bring it up unless he actually did and then he was mine. I mean could you trust someone like this? He claims that he doesn't do this usually, that I'm the only other girl he spends all day flirting with over MSN and that he really cares about me but can I believe him?

If he so easily meets a girl after work and makes out with her whilst with his current girlfriend he could do the exact same thing to me ... couldn't he?


*Boy with a Girlfriend is an interesting "friend" that I have who claims to adore me completely and says that he thinks I am the best thing since sliced bread. Since December last year we have flirted none stop and exchanged in some pretty dodgy emails but only in the past couple of months have we started to really cross the boundaries and I'm beginning to wonder if I am, in fact, the other woman.